| name: | METR |
| pronouns: | they/hymn |
| birthday: | april 30th |
| site opening: | 10/17/2024 |
| site name: | METR'S COMPUTER |
hi im metr and we are a puppycat (met) and a bird (metmet). sometimes we are a computer. sometimes we are nothing at all.
⚠︎ the site may contain content of mental illness.
I always talk about how much I wish I could rebrand or change my name because I feel so disconnected with the names I use. I think I seem like I don't know why I can't feel like my online identity, but I do really know why deep down.
My identity as an artist is always seperated from my personal self. I'm scared of being open online because people can use the things I suffer with against me, and I don't want to make friends because I'm afraid of being abandoned.
I don't want people to know about me so they'll stay away and I can't be hurt.
Recently I've been a lot more talkative. It makes me happy to share things about myself with people. But my online identity is meant to be very distant, so there's dissonance between how I behave and how I perceive my identity.
Does that make sense? Probably not. I can't figure out if this is just a bpd issue or just a normal thing. even mentioning my bpd right there makes me feel both relieved and sick to my stomach.
I don't know what the right answer is. I don't want to be alone and I want to talk to people, but I can't stand this feeling. It's irritating and drives me mad. So I don't know if I'll rebrand or not.
I think even if I did, I think the whole thing would repeat. I'll rebrand to distance myself and over time wish to talk more, and then the feeling will come back.
sorry if i don't post a lot for now i want to figure out what i want
its funny how i have two characters name kieran that i really like!
im really liking kieran. i never played pokemon sv but i did watch rtgame play... the base game, not dlcs.
Ive only now started to look into kieran, and now i really wished i bought pokemon sv and not arceus...
arceus is a fun game, dont get me wrong...!!
its just not my taste character wise which is my main motivation for playing games.
I like volo A LOT but thats kinda it.
plus i know the story so its a bit boring playing through...
art by @SD__BN__ (twt)
i love you my 14(?) year old with autism and undiagnosed bpd.
the other kieran i love is kieran valentine.
i almost named myself kieran! i wish i did.
but i was too scared im not boyish enough to have a name like. oh well.
A prize for an art raffle i held on bsky!
recently the last few weeks have been agonizing. i've been feeling so horrible mentally and i don't think things would get any better. it's hard to get out of bed. the past few weeks ive only eaten one meal in a day, occasionally. im still taking my medications but they arent working. i can still feel every single thing. i try to keep myself positive but i hate every single thing in my life.
im excited for the sonic 3 movie
usage for free
I remade my commission info finally. I deleted the lined artworks because it made my comms look unclean.
I also updated my portfolio carrd to include commission info!
It's almost halloween!
the potoo is my favorite bird. its so cute and even a bit regal in a way. i dont like it when people insult the potoo but its okay because the potoo will still be the potoo regardless of whether or not people like it.
if i was a bird, i probably wouldn't be a potoo. unfortunate.
im not sure what id be yet.
probably a type of songbird. a red one too, because where i live occasionally i see a bright red bird. im pretty sure its a scarlet tanager.
Fanillust of my favorite character of "Welcome to the Yandere Cafe," Haruto...!!
The manga's first few chapters are translated, but unfortunately not any further than that...
Regardless, I'm a big fan.
⛓️ MAD LAB PARTY 🎭
The "Jack-O-Killer" is known for its gruesome halloween crime scenes.
Problem? You're the killer.
And you KNEW you didn't leave their bodies like that.
A short Not-So-Serious VN for free on itch.io for Spooktober 2024.
